Ramblings of a Woman Awaiting Birth
My water broke Wednesday night around 1 am. I was in that I've-been-laying-here-for-an-hour-but-not-really-sleeping-because-I'm-too-achy state. Suddenly I felt a pop of fluid gush out, a little wave of nausea, and my body started trembling. There was no mistaking what was happening. I leaked a trail into the bathroom and started cleaning up, feeling some nervousness and excitement over the reality of the oncoming labor. I smiled to myself thinking that my membranes just ruptured all over the government's stupid loaner pillow that I'd been sleeping with in-between my knees for the last couple weeks. It felt vindicating to do that on their property after all the problems they've caused us with this move. I actually let out a devilish little cackle.
In the morning, I realized it was actually my own pillow after all. There goes that fun.
Well, it is a day and a half later and I am STILL waiting for labor to start! I've had just enough contractions to kill my sleep for the past two nights, but not enough to go into real labor. Two dreamless nights and the fun hasn't even begun!
My mom said her water broke before labor when she had my sister. Her water broke at 11pm, and my sister popped out three hours later. I was expecting to be more like my mom.
I read that only about 10% of women have their water break before labor starts. And of those women, 85% are in labor within 24 hrs. Stats don't help much, do they?
I am nervous because if my body doesn't decide to go into labor soon, I will have to get induced. I really want a drug-free, IV-free labor. I supposed if this whole child-bearing thing has taught me anything, it would be that I have no control over most of the decision-making going on in my body. A couple months ago I was pretty pumped about a water birth, but then I found out they won't do those in Sweden. But they would let you sit in a tub until push time. Unless your water breaks early. So there goes that plan too!
Research schmesearch: In the US, if your water breaks, you have at most 24 hrs before they induce labor on you because they say there is too high a risk for infection after that. In Sweden, they think it's not quite as imminent a risk and let you go 2 - 3 days before inducing labor.
However, in Sweden they won't allow water births because they say there is a higher risk for infection. But in the US, current research says that isn't true and water births are a growing trend.
I recently read something else (on baby sleep) where the U.S. findings and Swedish findings were exactly opposite as well. Gotta love "scientific" research!
Here is something that sounds even more hippy that wanting a water birth. As I was out walking along the water last night, I was thinking how perfect it would be if I could have birth outside with the birds and trees and grass near the water, and a midwife just set up her little station of things for delivery under a tent there or something. I would summon the strength of the wolves that would be howling in the distance, the grace of the birds floating by, the calmness of the still water, perfectly in tune with mother-nature, and bear my son. Haha. Kidding. Kind of.
But really, I felt good, strong, graceful, calm and in tune with myself out there on my nature walk. Like I could handle labor. When I was in the hospital this morning for my check up after my membranes ruptured, I ended up feeling stressed, frustrated, tense, awkward, and out of my element. I hope the experience is a little less frustrating when I finally go in for the actual birth.
In case you were wondering, skipping during a walk (first checking both ways that no one is watching) will not induce labor.
Laughing really hard also doesn't induce labor. But it can give you contractions. Rob has done that to me a few times now. On our way to the hospital yesterday morning, Rob drove our Lexus the way a sports car is meant to be driven, crying out frantically "She's having a baby! She's having a baby!!!" Even though there was obviously no rush whatsoever. It cracked me up so hard I started contracting.
The nesting instinct is real. I'm not sure if I have ever gone into such an emotional upheaval as I did all day on Tuesday after finding out that our housing items that were supposed to FINALLY arrive the next day were delayed yet another week. I was Angry. I was ready to make the house perfect for the arrival of Biggie Smalls and now I can't do anything. The neighbors may have wondered what sort of wild animal was making those roars in our house. I fantasied about punching my fist through the walls and breaking all sorts of things. I settled for throwing a pill bottle, a highlighter, and Rob's old i-phone that is already broken. I threw them so hard that I broke the cap to the pill bottle, the cap popped off the highlighter, and Rob's phone is broken a little better now. Pretty wild mama, huh? Then I picked up it all up so as not to make a mess nor alert Rob of my insanity (although I think he may already be on to that). Rob helped me work through my nesting issues later that night (apparently Biggie Smalls won't do a quality control check on our house when we bring him home) and I think I am back into my good ole' peaceful hippie/Buddha mindset that it's all just material possessions which I am totally fine, maybe sometimes even better off, without.
I am SO excited to meet our son. My body has about 17 hours left to figure out how to go into labor or I get induced, and if that doesn't work, c-section. I know the end goal is just to have a healthy baby. But I am actually looking forward to the birth and hope the experience isn't taken away from me. Like I'm in the last mile of a race and and the sweep wagon is hot on my heels, trying to make me get in and take a ride to the finish. I hope I can make it on my own before I'm forced into the sweep wagon.
Tick-tock, tick-tock...
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